Report from Ladder Company 40 Day 173

Hi Team.  (No explanation point, sorry)

I am still very freaked out.  A little more calm but still freaked out.  I know I should not be when I don't have any evidence one way or the other, but it's easier to know that than to practice it.  I keep thinking about it.  My kids would be 18 years apart.  I'd be sixty when my kiddo was ready to graduate.  I guess that is one way to ward of empty nest syndrome.  Sigh.  I just feel like if that happens, I'll have to kiss my dream goodbye again.  And it won't be revived after that.  I'm pushing it now.  I think I've gone from panicky to feeling very low.

I told my husband.  He took it like I knew he would.  He stayed very calm and didn't appear the least bit concerned.  He said I shouldn't stress it until I knew something.  I said that I knew that.  Then he started to get on my case about "why are you stressing then?"  I had to explain to him what I just said in the first paragraph of this post.  It's easy to know when you're being irrational.  It's not so easy to change the feelings that go with it.

Those closest to me who know what I am going through are having a wonderful time of it.  The evil laugh of my assistant when I told her was almost unbelievable.  Then later she came to me out of the blue and said to me, "Mrs, Hotlash, I'M NOT!" and jumped up in the air and clicked her heels together. 

At first, being out of context of our work, I didn't know what she was talking about and I said, "Not what?"
But the big gleeful smile and the evil laugh that followed made me realize what she was talking about.  She is having WAY too much fun at my expense.

I told my mom tonight and now she's freaked out FOR me.  Even she commented on how ironic it is though.  Another time would have been fantastic!  Now, not so much.

OKAY:  Report time.

I didn't sleep much at all. :(  I did drink plenty of fluids... Nearly three quarts.  Most of it was sugar free iced tea drink mix, though I did allow myself a glass of Cherry Pepsi at lumch out with my staff today, but only one 12 oz. glass!  That's a habit that could re-form WAY too easily.  Since lunch was also a staff meeting and I ran errands for work during my entire split today, I worked 12 hours straight today.  I didn't go out of my way to exercise but it was not an exercise day for me either.  I can fairly claim two for three for the day.

In Ladder Climbing news:

My second CERT class was tonight.  The topic was "small fire suppression".  Our fire departments inspector taught our class tonight.  We covered all kinds of  prevention stuff, more in depth than most talks and lectures I have heard in the past.  We talked about how fast fire grows and about the kinds of conditions that can change rapidly during a fire.  We covered the importance of the buddy system and that reverting to "Plan A" was always a good option to take. (Plan A is RUN AWAY!)  After lots of lecture, lengthy question and answer periods, and a few videos, we were ready to put on our green CERT helmets, goggles and gloves and go practice with the fire extinguishers.

My CERT issued gloves were a joke!  I think they would have been too big for my feet, with my shoes ON!  When I saw them on Tuesday night I made it a point to make time to go buy gloves that would work better for me.  I had a hard time finding leather gloves small enough.  I found some that were close but on some parts of the back of the hands there was some kind of "polysomething" fabric.  I didn't know if the CERT class instructors would accept them as a substitue for the standard issue "one size fits all" (that doesn't really) gloves.  I needent have worried.  When my partner and I stepped up to take our turn putting out the fire, the Fire Inspector looked at my gloves as I took the extinguisher from him. 

"I see you got some practical gloves!  Nice going," he said.

Sadly, we did not get to put out any real fires, though it had been planned that we would at least have flames!  They use a computer operated fire machine, for lack of anything better to call it.  It creates controlled flames and you spray the extinguisher at the sensors on the side panel of the machine that the flames come out of to simulate sweeping across the base of the fire with the blast from the extinguisher.  Unfortunately, while we were inside the classroom, the rain messed with the machine and then the Inspector was not able to ignite the fire.  So we put out invisible ones.  BORING  but probably not any more boring than putting out "fake" fires.  Still, I guess it's better to have fake fires than to be called on to put out real ones.  I guess!  Seems logical anyway.  Unless you're a goofball like me who has dreamed of doing just that her whole life.  Sigh.  (At least my bro lives my dream!  -well... Part of it anyway.  He isn't a paramedic.)

Last but DEFINITELY not least, I want to wish a BIG WARM WELCOME and THANK YOU to Brian for joining my team and following my blog!  I have been enjoying his blog:   Switch 2 Plan B: Misadventures of a Firefighter   http://www.switch2planb.com/

*Note to Brian:  I have to admit I was a little embarrassed at the thought that you joined when my "freaking out" post was the post of the day!  But you have a wife.  I'm sure you understand. LOL  And it really made my day to see you as my new blog follower!

I cannot tell you all enough how much it means to me that you stick with me even through the most boring posts and continue to encourage me and lift me up in prayer the way you do.  I feel so blessed to have friends like all of you.  Even the ones I have not met.  I hope some day to have the pleasure of meeting all of you.  I'd give you a great big hug of appreciation, that's for sure!

Stay safe everyone!

Hotflash out.